California Dreamin'

On Saturday morning we got up at 5:30am to start our long journey to California. Jiro jumped right out bed, excited to see why on earth we were getting up while it was still dark. Satchel acted more like a teenager and we wondered if we'd be dragging him to the car in his pajamas.

By the time we got to the airport at 7am, everyone was excited, except me. I was stressed and cranky. I was sure that I forgot to pack the right things and the things I did pack were not really organized. "We don't have a very tight system," I whined to Warren. "I'm never packing again."

As we boarded the plane, a way too smiley steward informed me that the carry on wouldn't fit on the plane and that I would have to leave it on the jetway. As, I opened the bag to search for the essentials, my suspicions were confirmed--the sippy cup I stowed in the outside pocket had opened and everything was soaking wet. Dammit. I quickly pulled out the snack bags and left the bag on the jetway. At least it was water and not juice.

As I re-entered the plane, I immediately heard Jiro's screams and everyone seemed to be staring at me. Warren had stopped in one the front rows to wait for me and Jiro was desperately trying to get off the plane in search of me. He must have thought I was trying to sneak off or something.

I scooped him up and we headed to our seats...which were on the very last row of our very full plane. We'll never make our connecting flight I pessimistically thought to myself. "We'll never make it!" I whined to Warren, who was attempting to enjoy every minute of his two week vacation. Why did they give us a thirty minute layover? Why? I moaned in my head.

The plane had two seats on each side, but we only purchased three. Warren and the boys sat on one side and I sat next to a man on the other. Jiro couldn't stand the thought of not being near me and lunged for me across the aisle. I grabbed him and tried to calm him down, but he just wanted OFF. "It's okay baby, " I said. "Calm down before you make this nice man wish he never got on this plane," I added.

The nice man smiled and said, "Oh don't worry about me."

Sure I thought. See how you feel after 2 hours and 53 minutes of this.

Once everyone was settled, the turbo stewardess rushed over and said, "Can you sit on the other side where we have three oxygen masks?"

"Uh, can I just hand the baby to my husband if we lose air pressure?" I asked, not wanting to deprive Warren of the window seat.

She didn't seem to like the idea very much, but didn't seem to want to argue with me either. Besides, she had bigger fish to fry...

I notcied a woman a couple of rows ahead of me travelling with her four, FOUR, small children and no husband. The smiley steward and the turbo stewardess went over to her. The smiley steward began speaking to her in Spanish as the turbo stewardess gesticulated wildly. As I watched the woman rearrange all four of her kids I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself.

Soon we were in the air, looking out the windows, eating snacks, and having a pretty good time. Jiro was now freely going back and forth between me and Warren, taking it all in. The smiley steward came over to me and said, "You can't keep passing him back and forth, he's going to have to stay in your lap."

We'd been in the air maybe fifteen minutes. Uh, right. I tried my best to comply, but it was really just futile.

An hour later smiley steward and turbo stewardess retreated to the front of the airplane in defeat to flip through fashion magazines and talk trash about all of their unruly passengers. Meanwhile we were in the back, still snacking and exploring our immediate surroundings.

The teens immediately in front of us pulled out their DVD player and started watching Star Wars, much to Satchel's delight. Turns out the teens belonged to the nice man next to me and upon seeing Satchel's interest in Star Wars, offered to let him watch on his laptop. He pulled out a case and revealed the entire Star Wars DVD collection. "Which one do you like the best?" he asked Satchel.

I had a flurry of thoughts...

How nice!

Maybe we will make it through this flight!

Now we'll have to get a laptop for the flight home.

How am I going to keep Jiro's curious fingers from mangling the nice man's laptop?

Is this nice man crazy?

Look how happy Satchel is.

He'll never be content to just look out the windows again.

Turns out the movie could only hold the kids' attention for a few minutes and we were able to safely return the laptop to the nice, but a little crazy, man. The last 45 minutes of the flight were rather tortuous. Jiro refused to nap without his blankie which was in the carry on that never made it on. Satchel and Jiro were both getting incredibly antsy. We did a few trips to the front of the plane to quiz the smiley steward on our odds for making our connecting flight. "They only gave us a thirty minute layover," I said anxiously.

"Oh don't worry, they do that all the time," he cooed.

"Is it a small airport?" I asked, hopefully.

Smiley laughed. "No," he said with a shit-eating grin on his face. That's what you get for not staying quietly in your seat he thought maniacally in his head.